Friday, April 28, 2006

Guerrilla Magic

I met up for dinner last night with a fellow magician called Paula. We originally struck up an acquaintance via one of the online magic discussion fora. I got in touch when I arrived back in the UK last year, but she had moved away from London. I've been spending a lot of time in Norwich recently, but have only been driving up in the last few weeks. It was then that the penny dropped - I pass a turn-off for the town where Paula lives, so it might be possible to meet up for dinner and some magic chit-chat.

So, I dropped her and email, and between last week and this, sorted it out. In the event, she came to Norwich, and so off we trotted to one of Norwich's many fine eating establishments. I had a very nice time indeed, and I think Paula did, too. You know when you meet someone for the first time, and you just get on? It was like that. Really easy, friendly, and lovely.

Within two minutes of arriving in the restaurant, Paula had her magic kit box out and was off at the next table doing some guerrilla magic for a lovely little girl who was there with her mum and dad. I was really quite amazed at how easily Paula just got into it, and after a while, I joined in, too. In between courses, we did some more, and then we retired to the bar for more gossip, magic talk and show and tell of favourite effects.

One of the things that many magicians like about our clubs and so on is the social aspect of it. I've struggled a bit with that, because my first forays into that world were marred a bit by an attitude that had a whiff of homophobia, which obviously made me feel about as welcome as Gary Glitter at a girls school. However, the kind of magicians that I like to hang out with tend to be the ones closer to my own age, and they tend not to have an issue with the whole gay thing. And amongst the older ones, those who are full time professionals tend to have had sufficient exposure to the world of theatre to be quite used to hanging with the queens; and they're also the ones who are full of wisdom and insight acquired over years of performing.

Hanging out with Paula last night reminded me of why I want to be in a magic club. Also, she showed me some really cool magic, and that's always enjoyable.

Bible Basher Bashing

I've never had much time for that line that supposedly xtian phobes use about how "God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!" I'm sure they find it highly entertaining in their non-thinking, crowd-following* kind of way. However, even if your accept their "god created ..." premise, they only manage to push their agenda by careful editing. Fine, so god created Adam and Eve. But if you believe that he created the first two, then clearly he didn't stop after that. He's gone on creating. Including Trevor and Roger. And Trish and Lisa. And quite possibile Adam and Steve.

And whilst we're on the subject, whatsisname was a bit of an early career jockey, innit? Starts off with a good apprenticeship in carpentry, but packs that in for fishing (Matthew 4:19), tries his hand at shepherding (John 10:11), has a go at teaching (John 13:13). He didn't half jump about for an era in which there wasn't much in the way of career mobility. Wouldn't it have been fun if he'd stuck with the carpentry, and drawn all his analogies from that, and if the various biographies had stuck with that theme.
"Follow me, and I will ... erm ... give you a right good banging."

"You know, if you used a wooden mallet rather than a metal hammer, you'd be able to take these nails out after you'd finished with me, and use them on the next person."

The Vexing Ex

My ex, about whom I may one day write, wasn't very familiar with computer technology. One evening, I was steering the browser for him whilst he navigated to a few web sites that he wanted to visit. He had finished with one particular site, and I had started typing in the address for the next one, when he stopped me and asked me to go back one page at a time until we got back to the home page of the site we were on. Then he started reading out the address for the next site. When I asked him why he had done that, he said "For the next person."

At the time, because I loved him then, it seemed sweet and thoughtful. With the benefit of hindsight (which delivered unto my attention a full of appreciation of his role as a lying, cheating, money-grabbing, manipulative parasitical slut), it gives me something - more - to laugh at him for.

You know, there are times when you bury the hatchet but you just can't make yourself forget where.

Or stop wishing that the "where" was in their skull.


* I know that carpenter they follow often described himself as a shepherd, but surely that doesn't oblige them to become such sheep?


Jay said...

I don't have a lot of straight friends. I've nothing against them, but it's just a whole lot easier being with them, and being relaxed around them. We can check out guys together and I don't have to go all 'straight acting'.

But a fun chick who does magic? Hell yeah. It'd be like having dinner with one of the sisters from Charmed.

Qenny said...

A lot of our friends in NZ are straight, but most of our UK chums are gay. That's largely because our friends here are mostly my old friends from before I went down under, but our friends back home are couples that we met, or started spending more time with, after we met each other. We like doing dinner parties, and it often just works out that we're hanging out a lot with couples, regardless of sexuality.

The phrase "straight acting" is such a joke. I mean how "straight acting" can you be with a throatful of schlong? (Note: throatful rather than mouthful - they didn't call me head boy at school for nothing.)

Is "straight acting" just a euphemism for "can't kiss, won't kiss"?

Wyndham said...

Hey, qenny, thanks for the link, that's very nice of you. Your blog is magic!

*wyndham chortles at his own cleverness*

Actually, strangely enough I do know an Adam and Steve. They tell me they exist but neither of the fuckers materialise at the bar when it's their round.

Qenny said...

Why wyndham. And thank you.

This year, I had the joy of being able to introduce my friend Adam to my octogenarian next door neighbour, Eve. That was fun, although it didn't make me feel especially god-like.

Tickersoid said...

Sounds like a great evening together. I love meeting people you click with.

There is only one openly gay guy in our village. I think they either keep quiet or more likely move to Cardiff.
There are, however, loads of Lesbians. Stand anywhere in Pantymonywm and throw a polystyrene mug of tomato soup and you stand an 80% chance of violating one.

It's just a saying not a sport.

Qenny said...

Didn't they pass a bylaw so that there's only one allowed in each village?

Or indeed a bi-law, and they're only allowed one of them, too.

Tickersoid said...

Well done qenny, a little word magic there.

I was drinking with him a couple of weeks ago and noticed he has his own mug with that slogan on it. Only gay in the village.

Qenny said...

I'm sure most gay Welsh guys, wherever they are, have come to hate that slogan with a passion. Despite which, they probably all do Catatonia when they're in a pub and the karaoke machine gets wheeled out.

Tickersoid said...

You could well be right.

I think karaoke my become compulsory in Wales. Possibly because of the decline of 'chappel'. Got to have some reason to call it the land of song.

Qenny said...

I think it may long have that name. Friends of ours, who haven't lived in Wales for years but still retain a bit of the accent, when they take the karaoke mike, it's worth listening to. Stunning.

Tickersoid said...

I know a lot of people around here who are amazing. I don't think it's genetic, it's the singing culture.

Jay said...

You two should get MSN Messenger.

Qenny said...

I've tried it, and I just find it too intrusive, alas.

Fuckkit said...

But I thought you liked intrusive.
At least thats whats written on the toilet wall down the local...

Jay said...

I actually don't like MSN Messenger either. I used to like it, but that was when I was -ahem- younger.

Fuckkit: Oi, stay out of our toilets. That's where we have sex.

Qenny said...

fuckkit: it's all lies. I'm a top.

Qenny said...

jay: I don't think I ever liked it, even when I was younger. Admittedly, when I was younger was probably a lot longer ago than when you were :-) From the earliest days of ICQ, I remember thinking that it was just too intrusive. My PC is my only place of refuge from landlines, mobiles phones, and people who actually come into my presence physically. Ok, so emails intrude upon that refuge, but at least they can be dealt with in an asynchronous manner, and can be configured to arrive unobtrusively.

frobisher said...

I have a hatred of MSN as well - you never get a moments peace - people wittering on about crap, I quickly do "appear offline" but I am sure people think Miserable Bastard. Good for sending tunes tho'.

"manipulative parasitical slut" its nice when things end amicably.

Qenny said...

It is nice when things end amicably. Some of my closest friendships started out as a more intimate relationship, but when that didn't work out, we stayed friends.

Clearly, the ex in question isn't in that category :-) Equally clearly, I needed to learn to be more careful with my heart. And my wallet. So it was a learning experience.

shiftclick said...

Lovely insights into the Mind of Qenny. Love your descriptions ... Paula sounds like a Delight, Ex sounds like a Weener.

I wish America had magicians who moved about as freely ...

Tickersoid said...

At least if you're gay then you probably don't have kids. I was married to a women who.......Well if you can't say something nice.........Oh, I know, she wasn't a slut.

Good post btw. Why did you edit instead of putting in a fresh post?

Qenny said...

shiftclick: Paula is a delight, and a fascinating character, but it wouldn't do for me to tell all in such a public forum. Let me just tantalisingly mention that there's a lot more to her than meets the eye.

tickersoid: I admire your restraint with regard to the ex wife. I edited rather than posted anew because it was all on the same day. I'm still getting the hang of this thing, and did a couple of same day entries that went in different posts. I thought I'd try the same day entries in the same post to see which suited me better.

Tickersoid said...

Fair enough, I guess I was too blog active on that day. ( I've done the same thing myself)

'More to Paula than meets the eye',
Is that a magicians joke?

Kyahgirl said...

hello qenny-first visit. I've seen you at shiftclick's place and such so thought I'd drop in.

Enjoyed your line about wishing you'd buried the hatchet in the skull. I have an ex I wish I'd done that to as well. Oh well, they say hindsight is 20/20.

Qenny said...

As long as hindsight is 20/20 when throwing the axe, justice is served, innit?